she..

She lets things get to her more than she can handle. Something bad happened once; I don't understand why, why she holds on to it. Clinging so tightly, next to her heart, beside her pillow, its almost like she is afraid to be without it. I guess we are all afraid to be without it, that one crutch we rely on. It is there every time. I am not trying to blame her, or say that I know better. Really I don't, I am just on the outside so I can see it clearer. Sight, can we really see?
I felt it.
That is what really happened.

I wish so much for her to let go. The thing is she hates what she is holding on to, hates it so much. Is hate a type of love? Some people even capitalize, Hate. She thinks that because she has this she is worse off? Not true. She is incapable, incurable. Also not true.
Really she is beautiful, so why hold on? Questions.

try as it might, faith cant put a dent in fact, so must settle for watching science reenact the world

I feel like I should start some sort of Philosophers Cafe, but in my house so that I can discuss interesting topics with people. I always have these ideas and thoughts relating to books, music, dance, life and I generally dont have people to discuss them with. Either that or I dont have time to discuss them. I feel like there should be a place to release the thoughts in your head, that isnt snobby or you need a degree to attend. A place that is accepting of interesting conversation.

I was at cafe deux soleil this morning with my notebook an a copy of the Bhagavad Gita. Both books were on the table but I was mostly inspired by journaling. Regardless, a older gentleman sat down at the table across from me and asked to see my copy of the Bhagavad Gita and we proceeded to have a short conversation about it. I would really love to have a long conversation with a group of people from different backgrounds about the Bhagavad Gita, or any philosophical text. I want different opinions and backgrounds to collide so that people can expand their horizons and I can expand mine. Sadly philosophy doesnt come up in conversation much.

I also read M. Butterfly on the weekend and I would love to discuss that with someone. It is a play that deconstructs and deepens themes from the opera Madame Butterfly. It really interesting, there are so many things that you could talk about in relation to it. There are themes of sexuality, cultural boundaries, male and female roles, what interests me most is the illusions that are created within the story. It is really interesting.

So, anyone who finds this proposition at all interesting email me maybe we can have a group that meets up once a month to discuss things that we find interesting. I think there are only three people who read my blog, but if your one of those three let me know.